Dear Kim,
I recently entered into a civil union with my partner. We want to make sure our financial foundation is strong as we start this new chapter. What are your suggestions?
Sincerely,
Partnered Planner
Dear Partnered Planner,
Were you already cohabitating? If so, how have you been managing your bills up to this point? If you are just now joining households, have you had a conversation about money and how you will be dividing bills, or will you be depositing everything into a joint account and paying bills from there?
That conversation is very important, and unfortunately, it doesn’t happen often enough. Money is hard to discuss in our society, but if you love this person enough to join together, you should be comfortable enough and trust them enough to have that talk.
Is one of you a spender and the other a saver? If so, what boundaries are you planning on setting around expenditures? Will you set a specific amount where any purchase over that amount should be discussed first, or will each person be free to spend their own money as they see fit?
In my years as a CDFA®, I see these conversations not happen, and that often leads to conflict. Ideally, you should be on the same page regarding your money situation. There is always room for flexibility, of course, but you should agree on the big items. If you aren’t, consider employing the help of a counselor to work through your differences. It will pay off in the long term.
Kim
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